R.E.A.L. Youth Connections is about creating space to connect with boys and girls, mentors, families, and communities.
So, how do we accomplish this?
We do it primarily through our REAL Mentors Program. We meet in groups, face-to-face, mentors and students, and connect through various activities, conversations, and while enjoying snacks together. Conversations, speaking, and listening happen at every meeting… sometimes with a youth individually, generally in small groups, and on occasion in a larger group setting.
One of our recent conversations in the CHS boys group was around phones and technology. This was an exercise in sharing our personal thoughts and experiences. It came after a discussion on the rules of the group. Because of confidentiality I say who said what, but I can highlight some of the thoughts, feelings, and experiences that we all shared.
These are just a few of them:
- I felt that when I was talking, and you were on your phone, you weren’t listening — said by a mentor (m)
- I need to keep in touch with everyone — said by a young man (ym)
- It relaxes me at the end of the day, when I’m playing a game — (ym)
- I’ve been playing video games since I was 6 years old — (ym)
- I’ve been working with computers since the early 70’s — (m)
- Too much on-screen technology is not good for you according to research — (m)
- As I was driving away, I realized I didn’t have my phone, I felt very anxious without it — (m)
What’s meaningful here is not the specifics of what was said or who is right or wrong, but that there was space, or a place, for people to share their different experiences, thoughts and feelings.
As we share about ourselves, people get to know us. When we listen to others, we get to know them. And whether we agree or not with someone, we show them respect by listening and allowing them to express themselves.
When we feel free to express ourselves, even if what we say may be different, this is how we build connection with others.